Jungle Cruise Review: The Dwayne Johnson & Emily Blunt Theme-Park Adventure Would've Been Enjoyable If We Can Have F&B In The Cinema

​​​​​​​I like Dwayne Johnson. I like Emily Blunt. I think it’ll be fun to see them onscreen together in this movie inspired by the iconic Disney theme park attraction. The good news is, they don’t disappoint: their chemistry is off the charts. The bad news is, Jungle Cruise, strangely, isn’t as fun as I thought it would be. This big, lumbering, CGI-heavy spectacle follows intrepid scientist Blunt, her outdoors-averse brother Jack Whitehall, and riverboat skipper The Rock as they sail down the Amazon River searching for a miracle plant. Plot-wise, it’s a Franken-movie put together using spare parts from Pirates of the Caribbean (another Disney ride turned tentpole title), Jumanji and Romancing the Stone. This should have been as a rip-roaring as The Mummy, the 1999 version starring Brendan Fraser, but instead it feels more like Tom Cruise’s 2017 misfire. Look, Jungle Cruise isn’t bad, just a little underpowered, a little safe. Perhaps it can benefit from a tighter edit and more memorable villains (Edgar Ramirez’s cursed conquistador is a third-rate Captain Barbossa; Jesse Plemons’s German prince is too goofy to be menacing). Maybe it’ll play better with some snacks and sugar-free beverage to distract me from the monotony or overthinking things. But here’s the thing: Jungle Cruise is designed to sell popcorn, but what good is a popcorn movie if you can’t eat popcorn in the cinema?* (2.5/5 stars) Also on Premier Access on Disney+ for S$38.98