HONG KONG — In her high-necked blouse, light make-up and modest string of pearls, Gigi Chao, an executive director of Hong Kong real estate company Cheuk Nang Holdings, doesn’t come across as a brassy Hong Kong socialite and definitely not the woman at the centre of a bizarre controversy.

But the 34-year-old made headlines in 2012 when her father, real estate tycoon Cecil Chao, offered a “reward” of HK$500 million (S$81 million) to any man who could convince his lesbian daughter to marry him. A few months later, he doubled the sum to HK$1 billion. This dowry attracted 20,000 offers of marriage from a variety of suitors, including those who claimed to have created the world in seven days.

And while Chao’s story — which will be telecast tonight on the Channel NewsAsia programme Conversation With — may have started with her father’s infamous offer, it has taken on a life of its own. She has been hailed by gay rights activists as their new icon, and though it’s a mantle that Chao is visibly uncomfortable with, she said she felt deeply honoured. “I think I can only speak for myself and if others like what I have to say and somehow provide some sort of inspiration for them, I’m deeply honoured, but I can never profess to be an icon or a gay rights leader in any sense,” said Chao. “I think I just have a responsibility to live true to myself and if I can do that until my dying day, then I’m happy with that.”

And don’t think Chao is a vacuous socialite. She, like her father, was trained as an architect (one of her favourite architects is Zaha Hadid, best known for her neo-futuristic structures like the Guangzhou Opera House in China). She’s quick off the mark too: When asked if she and her father concocted the whole dowry incident to get publicity for themselves and their real estate development, she quipped: “You’re from the media and you’re the one (who asked for) this interview — so I don’t know.”

It would be easy to be cynical about this wealthy, privileged woman, but one comes away from the interview actually liking her. There is an awkwardness when she answers tricky questions that feels real. But what is most disarming about Chao is perhaps the real earnestness that appears as she talks about volunteering and her charitable foundation, Faith in Love, which helps the old and needy.

For Chao, it isn’t just a case of donating money for a cause: She doesn’t mind turning up in a baggy T-shirt and trousers to clean tables at an old folks home.

“There are lots of good human beings with an enthusiasm to help other people, but as we grow up and we go into business, we sort of lose the oomph and we think ‘Why don’t I just make lots of money and donate all this money to charity,” she said. “The point I am making is: Donating all this money to charity and actually participating as a volunteer is very different, in terms of connections that are made and the experiences you gain.

“I did lots of volunteer work — went to Africa and went to China — to understand, really, for my own benefit, to understand the world, to understand myself.”

Catch Gig Chao tonight in Conversation With, 8pm on Channel NewsAsia.