SINGAPORE — For most people, cakes are the highlight of any birthday celebration. However, one mother in Singapore has drawn flak online for not allowing her child to join his friends in enjoying a slice during birthday celebrations at preschool.  

In a TikTok video that has chalked up more than 181,300 views since it was posted last Thursday (Dec 1), user "Kyraxinyu" elaborated on the rather unconventional “no cake rule” she has for her son. 

"When his friends are eating cakes during their birthday celebrations at his (preschool), I got the teachers to offer him fruits instead,” she said, adding that her son is more than welcome to sing and celebrate the happy occasion with them.

"Kyraxinyu" pointed out though, that she does make an exception and allows her son to eat his own cake when his birthday comes around.

"When I was (preparing) the cake (for my son's birthday), I asked the teacher, 'How big should the cake be' and she said, 'It should be enough for 25 to 30 slices',” the mother said.

"If the teacher asked me (to prepare a cake of that size), it probably means that your child will be eating 25 to 30 slices of cake in school for the entire year because there are about 25 to 30 students. Am I right?"

The mother claimed that the amount was excessive even for adults and she did not want her "growing" child who "requires the nutrients" to associate cakes or junk food with celebrations.

"I'm just glad that I made a very good decision to let my child eat fruits when his friends have their birthday cakes", she concluded.

Her opinion was clearly an unpopular one because many TikTok users responded with scathing comments.

One viewer sarcastically wrote: “You sound like such a fun mum.”

Another top comment read: “(Luckily you’re) not my mother.”

Some users accused her of “overthinking”, “depriving” her child of simple joys and making him feel left out.

A user wrote: “As a person who has taught kindergarten for 16 years, I've met a few students who aren't allowed cakes in school and the poor kids always look so sad.”

However, a few users defended the woman's right as a mother to decide what is best for her child, as long as she does not impose her beliefs onto others.

MUM RELEASES FOLLOW-UP VIDEOS TO ADDRESS CONCERNS

In an attempt to address the negative feedback from social media users, "Kyraxinyu" published a two-part video on the matter on Sunday (Dec 4).

She began by recognising the concerns some TikTok users had raised regarding the social and emotional impact her decision might have on her child. She then went on to rebut a few points raised by some people.

On the point that children are able to burn off calories gained from eating cake quickly due to their energetic nature, "Kyraxinyu" said that she is not concerned over the sugar content of cakes but is trying instead to moderate the amount of processed food her child consumes.

“Processed food is found everywhere in our daily diets. Because we are already eating it on such a regular basis, all the more we should be mindful (and) be more selective, especially if we are eating for indulgence and not eating for necessity,” she added.

Kyraxinyu emphasised that her son did not need much convincing after she explained her reasons to him.

“I can’t say for sure that he’s happy with my decision but at least he is able to see where I am coming from,” she added.

In the second part of the video, "Kyraxinyu" said that although her son cannot eat cakes in school, he is allowed to enjoy the sweet treat — or other snacks — in social situations where she is around to monitor the amount he consumes.

“There is moderation and I choose the social setting (where) I allow him to eat.”

Addressing the comments that her son would resort to "revenge eating" when he is older or develop eating disorders, "Kyraxinyu" repeated that she does allow her child to eat cakes occasionally in order to prevent him from going “down (that) path”.

Wrapping up her video, the mother summarised that her intention is simply to teach her child the meaning of moderation. 

“At the end of the day, we all understand that moderation is key. But at the same time, everyone’s idea of moderation is very different. So we can all respect each other’s preferences without hate or judgement.”