SINGAPORE — Tensions flared when Ms Charmaine Tan, a senior executive in Mount Elizabeth Novena Hospital’s operations team, told family members in one ward that some of them had to leave owing to safe distancing measures.

The patient, an ailing woman, was surrounded by four family members when the hospital’s policy restricted visitors to only two at a time to prevent the possible spread of Covid-19. The incident occurred in early April.

Ms Tan, 27, who has been with Mount Elizabeth Novena for the last 18 months, was met with harsh words from the patient’s husband.

“The husband of the patient told me that his wife is dying and asked why I was not more flexible about it… I was a bit shaken as I did not know how sick the patient really was,” she said.

While the family eventually complied, Ms Tan said the episode, which was one of her earliest encounters dealing directly with hospital visitors and patients, deeply affected her.

“I wondered if I was being hard-hearted by enforcing the rules strictly,” said Ms Tan, who has been interacting more with visitors and patients recently as she is now also responsible for ensuring that precautions and systems are in place for safe distancing in the hospital.

Prior to that, her job scope mostly involved ensuring that outpatient centres at the hospital had the necessary resources to carry out their work.

Fortuitously, as Ms Tan grappled with her new role, she was able to turn to someone with more experience in dealing with patients and their families. Her mother, Ms Tan Mui Eng, 65, is the deputy director of nursing at Mount Elizabeth Novena.

The senior Ms Tan, who has been with Mount Elizabeth Novena since 2012, oversees more than 100 nurses and support staff in the endoscopy centre and operating theatre. She is in charge of ensuring that nurses adhere to personal protective practices in the operating theatre so that patients are not infected with bacteria or viruses during operations.

Ms Charmaine Tan (left) giving flowers to her mother, Ms Tan Mui Eng. Photo: Charmaine Tan

“My mother told me that what we are doing is for the good of the hospital and its patients, and we have to take it that our measures are for the overall good,” recounted the younger Ms Tan.

Her mother’s words have made it easier for her to handle visitors or patients who resist safe distancing measures.

SAFE DISTANCING AT HOME

While working under the same roof amid the Covid-19 outbreak means that the younger Ms Tan has had someone in whom to confide, life has changed for mother and daughter at home as a result of their professions.

Although both do not come into direct contact with Covid-19 patients in their daily work, they are nevertheless aware of the risk involved in working at a hospital.

“Being in healthcare, we are both aware of the real risk of getting the virus from anybody. Anybody can be a carrier, and we do not know who… So we have to take precautions and keep our distance at home,” said the elder Ms Tan, who has four decades of nursing experience.

“We didn’t want to take the chance since we interact with so many people at work every day,” chimed in her daughter.

As a result, the Tan household, which also includes Ms Charmaine Tan’s 67-year-old retiree father and her own husband, has gradually included safe-distancing practices at home.

For instance, family dinners are no longer lively, one-hour affairs. Instead, meals are taken quickly and everyone retreats to their rooms immediately to avoid excessive mingling.

Any subsequent conversations with one another are done over the phone.

These practices are not imposed by their employers, said the Tans.

While the hospital issues general advice to its staff on how to maintain hygiene and practise social distancing, there are no specific instructions on how staff should behave in their homes.

The Tans said that with the Government repeatedly emphasising the importance of safe distancing, they, too, gradually adopted these daily routines while at home.

A MUCH SMALLER WEDDING AFTER MUM’S ADVICE

Covid-19 has had other impacts on the family, too.

In February, the younger Ms Tan had to overhaul her wedding plans two weeks before it was to be held on Feb 22 out of concern that there could be an outbreak among guests.

She had initially planned for a solemnisation ceremony followed by a banquet at a restaurant here with more than 300 family, friends and colleagues.

“Logically, my husband and I felt we should reduce the risk (of our guests contracting the virus) to zero and not go ahead with the wedding. On the other hand, it’s a once-in-a-lifetime event and we thought maybe we should take the chance and go ahead,” said the younger Ms Tan.

Once again, it was her mother’s advice during their car rides to work that prevailed.

“I was the one who pushed her to cancel her wedding,” said the senior Ms Tan.

“My feeling is, if you know and love the people, but you know they are fragile and could be affected by the virus if they attend the dinner, the consequences are irreversible.”

Ms Charmaine Tan and her husband, Mr Soo Wei Cheng, 27, who is a salesman, eventually held a solemnisation ceremony in their home with only 50 family members and relatives as guests.

With Mother’s Day on Sunday (May 10), it looks as though family occasions will continue to be held in anything but the usual style of yesteryear in the Tan household.

Instead of the usual dinner outing with the family, the celebration will be a simple dinner, followed by a video-conference with Ms Charmaine Tan’s siblings and parents. She has two older brothers. One lives in Yio Chu Kang and another is based in the United States.

When asked if she was disappointed that Covid-19 has thrown a dampener on the Tans’ Mother’s Day celebrations, the elder Ms Tan said: “I’m just glad they’ve prepared something for me. At least they remembered Mother’s Day! I’m easily contented.”